Fad No# 6: TREE-CHANGE

Noise pollution, air pollution, light pollution, mind pollution. Sometimes I love this city with an aching tenderness, with its throbbing undercurrent of activity and potential, and other times I feel like I'm netted in a tangle of grit, static and hard grey edges. The boy and I are looking to buy land together away from the city. No-one real can afford a sea-change anymore, so the new, groovy weekend-magazine term is the "tree-change". We want to run away, have our own little hideaway, our own little piece of somewhere. It'll just be somewhere to go camping at first, a guaranteed private spot where we can set up mini-projects (I have a lovely pit toilet in mind!) and practise things like mud-bricks and simple building structures. Then who knows... we might run away there for good. Build a house and move t'country!

Wobbly

I am very tired, it is not advisable to blog when you are fatigued. A powernap could save my life. But instead, here I am, whispering into cyberspace, "I feel fragile. I am wobbly. Push me too hard, and like a jellyfish my skin might burst open and shower you with salt-water." Is it because I am a whoah-man, (So I Married An Axe-Murderer), or is it because I am just me, and me has a tendency to wobble, to take things the wrong way? Or am I just a big wanker who thinks she's a bit of a poet but is really just embarrassing herself?
Yeah, I reckon it might be that!

Things to loathe and lurve...

Stuff I don't like:
Pretending to give a shit about next season's range of department store pajamas... People! This is NOT important! I can't feign interest any more! I have to get a new line of work!!!
Sitting at a computer under fluoro lights for 8 hours.
Ironing. (Crumples look more arty and interesting anyway)
Holding in farts at the office. Letting one sneak out only to have some well-meaning colleague choose THAT whiffy moment to come have a chat on the edge of your desk.

Stuff I DO like:
Tinned tuna.
The feeling I have after doing some focused yoga.
CanSolo (my dear little car...warm, roadworthy, tinny and very yellow. A real Harry High-hat.)

Stuff I can't live without:
My three favourite cats in the world, one of them human.
...and now blogging, it appears!

The eternal contemplation...

Ah, Stella, she loves a good naval-gaze!

Not a scarf, not a collar...

...but maybe a "scolla"?! Clearly I still love that pink homespun-style wool. This is a made-up-as-I-went-along lil number, which I shall name Myrtle. I love it's guts out already!

Like sands through the hourglass...

...these are the scarves of my life! The pink knobbly one I just finished last week and am particularly pleased with, though the blue chenille bedspread and retro Japanese cartoon pillowcase scarf is a favourite crowd-pleaser too! I think they need names actually... the pink one feels like an Esther, and the recycled one I hereby name ..ummm... how about Yoshi? A tribute to the pillowcase! The striped one - Tigger. There. An exercise in stupidity... (interesting typo just happened there - "stupiDUTY": my duty to act stupid!) My stupiduties are about the only duties I effortless fulfil every day! Whee to me!
(Thanks also to the boy for sorting out my issues with posting pics and the like. Needless to say, boo to Safari and Yay to Firefox!)

Not a fad at all!

Penni's blog
This lil' lady is no fad... she's a lifetime link! Not only is she an awesome chick, but she's me best mate! And here's her eminently readable and very slightly addictive blog (but not in a stalky way, cos I know her so it's okay to go through her rubbish bins!).

Fad No# 5: KNITTING

Yeah, yeah, knitting, everyone's doing it, everyone's blogging about it, aint it fab?! But it IS!!! This is about my third winter of knitting, (ah, the seasonal fad!)and probably my most productive so far, though it's all been scarves, scarves, scarves - which aren't very adventurous, but ARE nice and achievable. Besides, I love a good scarf. I never did get around to entering this year's Craft Victoria Scarf Festival, sad date-challenged thing that I am, but I have an offering in the spirit of the whole affair... introducing my alter-ego Stella! She too is looking for a meaningful existence, and this image came about as a result of my first bout of knitting. One for all the textilophiles out there!

Fad No# 4: LISTS

Lists aren't really a fad for me... they're more a way of life! But I thought I could make a list of activites I would like to fad-ise sometime down the track...which might only be interesting to a list-nerd like me, but hey, it's my blog and I'll list if I want to!

Things to dabble in:
- massage
- jogging
- making dried fruit (for when I become an earth mother)
- stencil art (stay tuned for my upcoming arrest and short-lived stencil art career!!)
- screen-printing
- badge-making (for my slowly stagnating alter-ego character-based "art" ... see for more: http://craftbase.craftvic.asn.au/view.php?i=287)

I'm sure there's more, but the delicate balance with lists is not to overwhelm by making them trail on forever. I'll just make sure I jot down on my to-do list to update my fad-dabble list later.....

Fad No# 1: BLOGGING - the trials and tribulations

Clearly I STILL haven't been able to post images. I think my software is a bit outdated, cos Safari keeps crashing whenever I try and upload images, and I haven't had a chance yet to get hold of an upgrade... but when I do, boy oh boy will there be great pictures ... of stuff ... and things. And stuff.
Really quite good pictures.
I think.
:D

Fad NO# 3: TATTOOING

It started like this: I've got a few modest tatts of my own design, my closest mates and family are also of the inked variety, and deep deep down inside I always thought it would be a pretty cool job to be a tattoo artist. A few months back I mentioned in passing that in another life I would want to be a tattooist, and the said close mates all went "Yeah, do it! You'd be great! And we can get free work done!" I pondered this for a while, decided that life is short and you should grab by the balls the things you really want... but one of the great questions of the X-Gen is HOW do you know what it is you REALLY want? So many choices - how do you narrow it to the one you feel most passionate about? I sat on the idea for a few weeks, telling lots of people that I was about to embark on an illustrious career as a tattoo artist, and that all that was standing in my way were the minor details of a folio and an apprenticeship. Hee hee! Small, trifling hurdles no?! I finally got my arse into gear to go and have a chat to an awesome tattooist I knew by old aquaintance (at Chapel Tattoo in Windsor) to find out the process of getting into the industry. After a brief, but illuminating chat, I came away feeling somewhat shaky in my resolve. I still loved the IDEA of telling people I was a tattoo artist, and of looking at tattoos that were my designs, but there was a lump in my throat at the thought of how consuming of your waking life the job seems to be, and indeed needs to be if you want to get anywhere. I kinda sat on the idea a bit more, until it dawned on me that I had begun to guiltily avoid thinking about it, wishing I had never shot my mouth off about a pipe dream to everyone who stood still in my vicinity for 30 seconds. I have the biggest mouth I know, and I'm forever digging holes for myself, and here was just another ACME port-a-hole for me to step into. I decided to acknowledge the sad fact that wanting to SAY you're something isn't the same as having the get-up-and-go to BE that something. As far as I can tell, to be a tattoo artist, you have to be bloody dedicated, passionate, hard-working and single-mindedly focused on drawing, researching and working like a dog to establish yourself. Great kudos to those out there who are living the dream! Unfortunately, I am a bit of a lazy so-and-so, and clearly too piss-weak to make it in the cut-throat world of tattooing!
But, in the spirit of taking my utter piss-weakness and using it for good, here are the handy tips I was given by the lovely lady at Chapel Tatts for getting a foot in the door (I would like to add that these are not her words precisely, but rather my two-month old memory of her advice, so please don't send Chapel Tatts angry emails if you disagree with anything... I guess you should send them to me, or even better, just think angry thoughts in my direction!):
1) Get a folio together. This needs to be hand-drawn and hand-coloured tattoo flash (artwork), ideally on an A3 illustration board. Best to use good quality markers and ink pens for black-work. Choose as broad a range of images as you can, but keep in mind that you want to infuse your own personal drawing style into the artwork. Don't just do knock-offs of other people's work. If you have a genre that you really love and are strong in, maybe make that the focus of your folio. Three or four of these A3 sheets would be a good start. Draw all the time! According to my (not very extensive) research, your typical tattoo artist will work all day; tattooing, cleaning and making up needles, booking and consulting with clients, then go home and spend all evening working on drawings for upcoming jobs.
2) Research the tattoo studios you would like to get an apprenticeship with. If there is somewhere with an artist you like, it is worth getting a tattoo done by them, preferably of your own design, so you are showcasing your own work. This will help make you more memorable to the studio when the time comes to showing them your folio, and I guess gives you an opportunity to schmooze with them a bit! If you DO get offered an apprenticeship, be careful of what you are offered. Some places apparently ask you to pay THEM, but again, my source told me that any place worth it's salt wouldn't ask that, and that although apprenticeships are getting rarer and harder to get (the market in Melbourne at least is saturated with artists, so there's not a lot of room for newbies), you should expect to get some kind of wage for your time and energy, though it will probably be pretty crap and a struggle to live on.
3) Don't buy a beginners start-up tattoo kit online and try doing it backyard-style, as tempting and grungy old-school as that might sound. The order you're better off doing things is draw draw draw until you have a folio together, go see studios, and try to get in with someone who will already have big expensive things like autoclaves (sterilisers) and needles and stuff ( I want to say 'guns', but I think that might be really un-street to say... again, clearly I'm not a natural-born tattooist!) Mind you, I still kinda like the idea of getting a kit and doing at least ONE tattoo on just myself, just to see how it went. Maybe I could be a hobby tattooist?!

I wouldn't say that the dream is entirely dead, per se, but it IS in a bit of a coma, and might come back with a floppy face and a bit of a dribbling problem. I will still design my own tatts, for other people to commit to skin, and any inky mates who want my feedback/help will happily get it (starting with my little mate from Sydney who I met in the Andes... you know who you are pet!), but I'm beginning to realise that I don't have to take every interest and whim and try and turn it into my perfect career, do I? Hello? ....Do I?

I have nasty feeling that this blog is becoming a bit of a sad litany of all the ways in which I have failed to succeed. Or it could be a monument to the 'life is too short to stay stuck in one thing' credo! (I choose the latter)

Fad NO# 2: GRAPHIC DESIGN

My current J-O-B is in graphic design. It's a bit of a misnomer to call the job itself a fad, as it was a fluke opportunity that I stumbled across in a time of need and took up gladly in order to keep a roof over the cat's head. It was advertised as a 'graphic artist position in the textile industry', and as a badly struggling wannabe freelance illustrator with vague and broad-reaching creative goals, it sounded like it could be my new fad-du-jour. Once I got through the scary first month or two, making hi-there-howdy-and-hello chitchat with my new colleagues and nervously sweating all over the keyboard and wacom pad, I found I quite enjoyed the fact that I got paid to draw all day on the computer and crack gags with my new pals. It had plenty of perks - a part-time position, job-sharing with another illustrator; free garment samples to take home once the company had finished ripping off the overseas graphics; improving my computer skills... but soon the honeymoon started to wear off and the shiny realm of fad morphed into the grey-edged world of drudge. I began to see the garment industry (rag trade, sweetie!) for what it is... a voracious consumer of resources, both human and material, for the purpose of making and selling crap quality clothes. Don't get me wrong - I recognise the need for clothing production, and low budget clothing at that, but I think you have to be really INTO the whole vibe if you want to work in the trade and not get horribly bitter and twisted like I'm beginning to sound (eeep!). Really, it's not so much that it is all the work of Satan - it's just not my bag, baby! So I'm at the point where I rock up to work with a groan and tell myself that there is something out there better suited to me, something that I can feel good about, something that ADDS to the goodness in the world. This month, that something looks to be teaching! And I don't subscribe to the "those that can, DO, those that can't, TEACH" bullshit. The good teachers that I have known are doing the do right there! And training to be a teacher means I get to go back to Uni for a while and break away from 9-5 for just a little longer - woohoo!
... Just some thoughts on what I think people might get out of this blog should they stumble across it...
I guess if I'm talking about fads I've dabbled in, especially with a mind to making a lving out of them, it might be interesting/helpful/relevant to make brief mention of anything useful I've learnt about the fads I've tested out.
So, if you want to work in the clothing industry, these are some skills that it would be good to have:
- basic drawing ability (life drawing is great)
- good computer skills (Photoshop, Illustrator, using the net)
- interest in fashion (aha! This is where I fell down!)
- good sense of colour
- no moral objection to reproducing other people's artwork with minor changes to avoid copyright infringement

Now that I've had my rant about my job, I think the rest of the blog should be a bit less ANGRRRRRRY and a bit more happy-happy joy-joy!
Toodles! And remember kids, fashion is the work of the devil!

Fad No# 1: BLOGGING.

So in my meandering journey down possibly the wrong road in life, I have at last come across the world of blogging... and I have to say, I am already in danger of having a major tanty and throwing it all in before I even get going, which is my modus operandi for many new and wonderful ideas. But I am taking deep breaths and harnessing the power of positive thinking, determined to get my boyfriend to work it all out for me tomorrow! I want to upload pictures! I want visuals! I want instant gratification! (Curse of my generation, eh?!)
But remember, the pen is mightier than the sword, or in my case, the keyboard is mightier than the swearword - I shall persevere.
So why am I doing this?
Damn, existential query so early on...
Well, I thought it might be fun/interesting/tragic to chronicle the myriad of one-minute wonders I leap into, full of faith that THIS time it will be the key to my sense of purpose and meaning! This year alone I have wanted to be a yoga teacher, tattooist, at-home mum and now primary school teacher. A yoga-related knee-injury scared me away from yoga teaching, the idea of making a big hairy biker bleed from a tattoo that says "Live to Ride, Ride to Livv" gave me second thoughts about that one (Whoops! Sorry Big Bazza! There was no spellcheck on this needle!), and the whole mum thing is a bit soon for me and the boy to be getting into. (Besides, I have to decide what to be when I grow up before I grow up other little people). So the current answer to life, the universe and everything is to do a Graduate Diploma of Education and fill the minds of malleable children with knowledge and inspiration. Let's see how long it lasts.....